Not gonna lie some guy literally walked down my road an hour ago drawing faces on everybody’s cars
What a cockmunch
Like, he could have been nice and actually wiped their cars off
but instead he drew faces on them as if to say “I was here and put effort in to do something, but it was something useless.”
Lorde wins Best Rock Song and is understandably confused
do you ever cook something in the microwave but it’s still really cold in the middle and you just keep eating it instead of heating it longer because life is pointless and entropy is unavoidable and the universe is filled with callous and casual destruction
There’s a gecko thing on my window making noises and I want it to stop
I don’t speak Gecko, but if you tell it that you know 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance, maybe it’ll leave
Shut the FUCK up
Comedian and journalist Stella Young is tired of people telling her she’s an “inspiration” just for getting up in the morning. In a hilarious, hard-hitting, and thought-provoking talk at TEDxSydney, she explains why.
Two women in other parts of the country wanted to pay an overdue bill for someone in Detroit. This is their project.
I cant help right now, but hopefully some of y’all can.
a man is driving his son to school. they get into an accident and the man dies. the son is rushed to the hospital and when he arrives for emergency surgery the doctor says “i cant operate on this boy, he is my son!” how is this possible?
omg one time our english teacher told us this to try and show what a modern thinker he was and we were all like “it’s a woman” and he was like oh wow i thought he was gay i hadn’t thought of that
Q: Do you help the boners? Or do you—?
A: Full service.